Martin's Message: A Little Bit Like Frodo

Gandalf and Frodo in the Mines of Moria.

There is much emotion over the events that played out in Massachusetts, beginning with the Boston Marathon bombings and culminating in the manhunt for the alleged suspects, resulting in the death of one and the capture of the other. The angry knee-jerk reaction is that the treacherous and traitorous culprits deserve the fate of Benedict Arnold and Timothy McVeigh.

As the suspects were identified, more information was learned about who they were. Friends and neighbors were in disbelief that they could have been involved in what they were accused. Many described 19-year-old Dzhokhar Tsarnaev as a “normal teenager.” Which begged the question: What does “normal” mean?

I consider my two nephews—ages 18 and 15—to be “normal” teenagers. Its frightening to think that something so terrible could happen to either one of them that would completely transform their personalities. The thought was so overwhelming, that suddenly, amidst prayers for those who were killed and injured, mourning and searching, I found myself praying for the perpetrator, too.

I prayed that he would be found alive. I prayed for the law enforcement teams to have mercy on him when apprehending him. I prayed that the young man would survive. And I continue to pray that he will be given enough time to reflect on what he’s done, and that his heart be softened to the point of remorse and repentance.

On the afternoon following the capture of the fugitive, I sat in a McDonald’s restaurant surrounded by numerous “normal” teens, enjoying their freedoms, sharing lunch and laughing with their friends. It was hard to imagine Dzhokhar ever laughing and smiling again in this life. Maybe he doesn’t deserve any joy. Still, as more information is revealed to the public, I wrestle with conflicting feelings of outraged justice and patient mercy. Are the two mutually exclusive of each other?

In the 2001 movie based on the J.R.R. Tolkien literary series, “Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Rings”, Frodo discovers the creature Gollum has been stalking the troupe through the Mines of Moria. Frodo mutters, “’Tis a pity that Bilbo did not kill him when he had the chance.” “Pity?” Gandalf the Grey Wizard responds with mild surprise. He then gently corrects Frodo by saying, “It was pity that stayed Bilbo’s hand.” Gandalf continued to explain:

“Many that live deserve death. Some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them, Frodo?

“Do not be too eager to deal out death and judgment. Even the very wise cannot see all ends.

“My heart tells me that Gollum has some part to play yet, for good or ill, before all this is over.

“The pity of Bilbo will rule the fate of many.”

Frodo sighs, “I wish none of this had ever happened.” To which the Grey Wizard replies: “So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to do is decide what to do with the time given us.”

The scene concludes with Gandalf reassuring Frodo, “There are other forces at work in this world besides the will of evil.” The old Wizard goes on to say the events that happened were meant to be and that the role of the small, selfless hobbit is an encouraging thought.

Spoiler Alert: For those who have not read the books or seen the movies, in the end Gollum is destroyed, consumed by his own self-centered motivation, and that was for the best. But right to the end, through all the trials, Frodo kept faith that Gollum’s true self and good nature could be restored, otherwise Frodo held no hope for himself.

If this movie scene can be compared in any way to the senseless deeds of the Tsarnaev brothers, perhaps Tamerlan was meant to die in the firefight, just as Dzhokhar was meant to live. Perhaps there is some role this young man has yet to play in this chain of events.

My finite brain barely comprehends the immense heartbreak of loss and the hardship with which loved ones left behind must cope. Although Frodo weathered the storm, the experience changed him. However, rather than becoming vengeful and bloodthirsty, the experience strengthened his resolve to make his world a better place and increased his compassion for others.

Martin Richard: The Face of Hope

Then, amid the turmoil of our real world, there is forever in my mind the image of big beautiful eyes and the sweet smile of 8-year-old Martin Richard pictured holding his message of peace: “No more hurting people.” Having recently received First Holy Communion, Martin knew Jesus forgave those who hurt Him. As a civilized nation—and a good number of us Christians like Martin—should we not extend this mercy to everyone? 

The answer is not an easy one. To act with mercy is difficult. Because of all the hurt and anger out there, I wrestled with posting this entry and making public my feelings of pity for two severely "messed up" brothers. In no way do I condone or excuse what was done. Nonetheless, Gandalf's words echo in my head: “Do not be too hasty to deal out death and judgment.” As the events continue to play out, only time will tell what level of justice shall be delivered.  

We can wish none of this had ever happened, but all that's left is to decide what to do with the time given us. We must let go of anger and hold on to hope, and place the "good of all" ahead of our selves…just as Frodo did. From this point on, let us journey together to make our world the peace-filled place little Martin believed it could be.

Inspired by Martin Richard.

The First Time

I remember my first time like it was yesterday.

I was still young and naïve, not yet jaded by the world. But if every negative thing seen on television and the news was to be believed, there seemed to be an edge of risk and a little bit of danger involved. That made me a hesitant to try something new. On the other hand, lots of people had done it and continued to do it without serious consequence. As the demographic for “First Timers” was getting younger and younger, I wondered what was I missing.

Then, one bright summer afternoon in 1997, an opportunity presented itself and with curiosity running high, I ventured into the unknown. The experience was exciting and experimental and it made for a memorable event.

It happened in the office during the lunch break while the boss was away. There was roughly an hour to fool around, so I figured, ‘why not?’ I’ll admit, it was a little awkward at first because I didn’t quite know what I was doing. But soon I got the feel for it, and it was a wonderfully magical moment.

I’m talking about the first time I logged onto the Internet, of course.

At the beginning of my career, the Internet as a business tool was not as widely used as it is today. Back then, the new fangled “http-colon-forward-slash-forward-slash-WWW-dot” string of characters was used only by a handful of businesses in print and television ads. Web addresses seemed so cryptic its almost laughable now.

What you'll see at MenWhoLookLikeKennyRogers.com

In the office where I was working at the time, only the boss’ computer had Internet access. While access to the World Wide Web and email for our small staff was still weeks away, the boss encouraged us to take time on our lunch break to "surf the net" on her computer.

So where did my colleagues and I go first on the web? As we gathered around the monitor on our boss’ desk, one coworker asked, “What should we look for?” I don’t remember from where I got the web address, but I suggested a fun site called: www.MenWhoLookLikeKennyRogers.com. On this site, viewers could submit photos of men they knew—or just random strangers—who looked like the legendary singer and recent Country Music Hall of Fame inductee Kenny Rogers.

Mom & "Kinda Kenny" Marty Edwards.

You’d be surprised how many men actually sport the “Gambler” look: white hair, neatly trimmed beard and moustache, button down shirt with a black leather vest and jeans. The website features over 1,000 photos of men from all over the country, Tips on How to Look Like Kenny, the “Kenny Hall of Fame” and my personal favorite “Kenny of the Year.” Once you view this website, you’re going to enjoy conducting your own “Kenny Sightings.” And although the website is still active and updated, the owners are no longer accepting photos.

While we are on the subject of Internet “Firsts,” I will never forget the first email I sent in September of that same year. The online experience was more of a serious nature.

News broadcasts contained numerous reports in which two young boys had lost their mother in a horrible car crash. Among the reports was a bit item about an email address that had been established for mourners to send their condolences to the family. I thought that was such a lovely idea.

On my lunch hour that day, I composed a brief letter of sympathy to the two boys. Naturally, my coworkers were curious and inquired to whom I was writing. After explaining my heartfelt intentions, I asked if they cared to include their names to the sentiment. After adding each name, the “Send” button was clicked.

There was an outpouring of grief from people all over the world when the Princess Diana died. I can only imagine my email to Buckingham Palace was one of many sent to her sons, Prince William and Prince Harry. I don’t know if any of the emails that were received had actually been read by them, or if they were comforted by the messages they contained. I hope so. For me there was a silent comfort from a digital message that traveled to the other side of the planet and converged in one place with so many others.

Fast forward to this year. It is another exciting “Year of Firsts” for me, including my first Tweet on Twitter: Psalm 19:15. "May the words of my mouth, the thoughts of my heart, win favor in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer." This same Scripture passage was also included in my first blog posting.

I occasionally enjoy frivolous activity on the Internet, but there is more satisfaction making meaningful connections with other people, whether is it business or personal. The first of many millions of electronic messages I have sent over the years—and will send in years to come—was something profoundly human. With each new technological advancement of electronic communications, I will always look back fondly at the “first time”.

Inspired by my “First Time.”

DO YOU REMEMBER the first email you sent or received, the first website you visited, or your first Tweet? Leave a comment below and share your memories about your first time!

Among Comic Strip Royalty

Charles, Bill...and Me.

This weekend a bicycle expo was held in the area. One of the exhibitors is a popular bicycle shop called Wheel & Sprocket. And although I am not a cyclist, seeing a promo on television for this event reminded me of my own connection with the bike store.

Some years ago, Wheel & Sprocket sponsored a contest for local artists to submit a comic strip about the bike shop. Contestants vied for a chance to win a $100 gift certificate to the shop, and the winning comic strip would be published on the front page of the Sunday Comic section of largest newspaper in the city.

Now, about this same time, I had a young graphic design instructor who had a very “office professional” appearance and somewhat stiff demeanor. “Wynn”—not his real name—wore nice suits and neckties to every class. His hair was always neatly trimmed and combed. He had sharp facial features, and I personally rarely saw him smile.

If Wynn grasped any correlation between “Design” and “Art”, it did not show. Rather, it seemed that somehow, while earning his degree, he did not learn that many great masters like Michelangelo, Duchamp and Calder crossed-platform between 2- and 3-dimensional art, and lithographs and advertising posters created by Lautrec, Orazi and Max were works of art in themselves. Perhaps he was sick and missed class the day they covered Lichtenstein and Warhol.

Whatever the reason for his thought process, I struggled through two semesters of graphic design with him, not because I was a poor student, but because I had a slightly different view of the world. Wynn could be considered black and white “Wall Street Journal” and I would be classified as colorful “Funny Pages”. I shared my theory of Wynn’s irrational prejudice against the Fine Arts with Brian, one of my classmates, but he was not entirely convinced of Wynn’s alleged attitude against “Art”.

It is said that people may forget the words that were said to them, but they will always remember how it made them feel. I remember how Wynn made me feel and what he said. Near the end of my final semester, in unjustified disdain, he told me: “You have no business being in graphic design. No one will ever hire you.” After class, I cried in my car as I drove the long way home from school.

A few short days after the “Wynn Incident”, an envelope arrived in the mail, announcing my comic strip entry as one of the winners of the contest! Just weeks before graduation, it was a dream-come-true! I was to be published on the front page of the Sunday Funny Paper along with my comic strip idols Charles Schulz the creator of “Peanuts” and Bill Watterson the creator of “Calvin and Hobbes.” No one would hire me, indeed!

The next day, I practically flew to school with new wind beneath my wings, anxious to share this news with my classmates and especially Wynn. As I happily reported on the pending printing of my winning comic strip, one girl inquired what the strip was about. When I described the four-panel sequence, she bitterly remarked that my idea was “offensive to women.” I was stunned. What had seemed like vindication, now seemed like the greatest politically incorrect, social faux pas soon to be published and seen in every household in the city…with my NAME on it! I was just sick at heart.

I’m not exactly sure what my demeanor was when I returned home from school that afternoon, but my Dad sensed something was bothering me. When he inquired how my day at school was, the floodgates opened and the events of the preceding days came gushing from within me. I could feel myself teetering on the edge of tears, and with calm “Father Knows Best” wisdom, Dad responded simply, “They know you are their competition. Don’t let them get to you.” Situation instantly defused.

Never had it occurred to me that my classmates were “competition”. I always viewed them as my peers and equals. Until Wynn, I always believed my teachers were on the same team with me…weren’t they? The same can be said about my view of coworkers and managers.

In my early managerial position, I had interviewed many interns in whose portfolios I recognized Wynn’s assignments. On more than one occasion, upon the mention of his name, applicants confided that Wynn made them cry (all of them women). This behavior was his Modus Operandi, and I began to realize the problem was much bigger and belonged soley to him.

Throughout my career, I have come across many bitter naysayers like Wynn and that female classmate—who is so insignificant now that I don’t remember her face or her name. But both have been proven wrong. The NOW never did march upon my family home to protest my harmless little comic strip. Someone DID hire me, and above all, I have been blest with a wonderfully productive and artistic career in graphic design.

Whether or not any situation is viewed as a competition, there will always be someone trying to outdo, one-up, and distract you from your goals. Don’t let them get to you.

Inspired by Dad’s words…and how they made me feel.

My winning entry in the Wheel & Sprocket Comic Contest.